Mar. 12th, 2015

clevermanka: default (changed priorities)
I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

I've reached a stage in my life where I need to not just deal with fear, but embrace it (within reason). If I want positive change in my life, I need to change things. I'm the one who needs to change. And change is scary, always scary (for me), but it's not always bad.

[ profile] mckitterick woke up early this morning and crawled into bed with me. Neither of us could get back to sleep, so we chatted and snuggled for a bit, but when the topic of a potential Big Change came up, I was all "Ahhhh can we not talk about this it's stressing me out and I'm not even out of bed yet. Stress does not belong in my bed!" And it's true, I don't allow stressful talk in bed, but I need to get past the levels of stress this particular topic evokes in me.

To do that, I'm starting to engage my smaller fears. Anything gets easier with practice, right? So if I regularly expose myself to change and new experiences, the Big Deals will be less stressful.

So for my first trick, tonight I'm gonna do my best to get into a headstand (Sirsasana) (with [ profile] mckitterick spotting me). I can do a teddy-bear headstand with no support, but tonight Imma try to get my legs up. I'm a long way from being able to do a handstand (my shoulders are more flexible than they are strong and they tend to pop out of joint in a handstand), but I'm strong enough to do a headstand. It's just the getting there.

Anyone else feel like trying something new and frexiting with me this week?


clevermanka: default (Default)

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