clevermanka: default (Default)

Tomorrow morning I get to see one of the KU dorms get blown up. That'll be fun! I'm taking the whole day off so I've got a five-day weekend, aw yiss. I want to do another day of food prep (if I can get six more meals made for the freezer I'll feel like I'm in good shape for the weeks I won't be doing much cooking) and finish my due South Sekrit Santa art piece and enjoy a couple days of weekend before I head back to my last week of work.

I was already sure I'd made the right decision about the hysterectomy but my body decided to prove in no uncertain terms that removal was the way to go. Either that or it's just throwing a hissy fit.

My last period wrapped up on Wednesday last week, but when we were hanging out with friends Friday night, I started cramping something fierce, to the point that I had to go home early. Since then I've been pretty much having a second period, only about twice as bad as a normal period. I wonder if the extra dark blood and clotting was triggered by the biopsy. It's not fun, whatever it is.

Pre-op consultation with my surgeon is this afternoon. I have a big list of questions for her. Ugh. I just want things to be done at this point.

Really looking forward to working on this dSSS piece.

Today's Tumblr collection is Tuesday, November 24: Hamilton. Heads up! This collection was so large I split it into two. The second part will post tomorrow (Wednesday) at 9am CST.
clevermanka: default (winter)
Today's Tumblr is Tuesday, November 10: Jeeves & Wooster.

I called in sick with cramps yesterday. Spent pretty much the entire day in bed. I told [ profile] mckitterick it was a practice run for surgery recovery. Also a nice confirmation that yeah I think I'm doing the right thing by getting this organ removed. I'm still not happy about it, but I feel better about the decision, anyway. Oh! I spoke with Dr. Khosh about the upcoming surgery and he was very supportive and said he felt this was probably the best decision, too. I was kind of surprised at that, not even a suggestion of trying a non-invasive solution to the fibroids. Good to have my health care practitioners support my decisions!

Gotta catch up on the stuff I didn't get done yesterday, so back to work.


Nov. 3rd, 2015 09:01 am
clevermanka: default (blah)
I got the picture of my live blood analysis, finally. So here's what healthy red blood cells look like. Here's the sort of thing you find when you do an image search for Rouleaux. Here's what my blood looks like behind the cut )

Today's Tumblr collection is Tuesday, November 3: Squirrels.
clevermanka: default (post-dance)
It's likely I wouldn't get along with this guy in person, but he's not entirely wrong about guns and how to approach/use them. I found this one especially amusing: Make your attacker advance through a wall of bullets…You may get killed with your own gun, but he’ll have to beat you to death with it, cause it’ll be empty.

This cemetery yard is fantastic.

Errands, food prep, laundry, and seasonal wardrobe switcheroo happened on Saturday (locals are welcome for the couple days of beautiful weather since my summer clothes are packed away now--seriously, this happens every time), as well as the bachelorette party for my BFFs. I did it all on about 5 hours of sleep. Then Sunday (with four hours of sleep, even with the time-change extra hour) I attended the wedding. Ceremony only lasted about thirty minutes (yay!) but the socializing lasted six hours. It was great, don't get me wrong. I don't get to see these people very often. But wow am I tired. I got zero couch time over the weekend.

I nearly cried this morning (stinging eyes, hitch at back of throat) from how much I didn't want to come to work today. I'm so fucking tired and my spoon count is running perilously low.

Nearly halfway done with today, though. Nearly halfway.

Tomorrow I get my first mammogram. Good times.
clevermanka: default (winter)
People who've had their uteruses removed, tell me about your experiences. All the details, even if you think you're the only one in the world who had your issue(s). I want to hear about general physical changes, life impact, how it changed your orgasms, your moods, your everything--good and bad.

I am looking at just a basic hysterectomy. I would get to keep my ovaries.

Editing this post to add that the main overwhelming reason I am resistant to a hysterectomy is I have (have always had) spectacular orgasms with penetrative sex. Like, really great, mind-blowing orgasms. I have okay orgasms with other types of stimulation, but they absolutely don't compare to the orgasms I have with PIV sex and I'm pretty sure the Great Orgasms are largely due to the uterine wall contractions I experience with PIV orgasms. I know I will lose those with a hysterectomy (obviously), but maybe there's something else I'll have instead?

So yeah, that's how important those are. I am making a decision that will affect my health for the rest of my life based on how it's going to affect my sex life.

Anonymous commenting is on, so people who might come over here to comment from Tumblr can do so, and also if you're more comfortable commenting that way, go for it. I've screened the anon comments, is all, so they won't show up right away.

My online activity is going to be sporadic today (I'm catching up on three days of missed work, and I have a two-hour meeting this morning) so I might be slow to respond, but I value everyone's input.
clevermanka: default (going well)
Not likely to be, anyway, so let's at least know that's off the table. The news is super shitty, though, and it's taken me over 24 hours to get to the point where I feel like I can put any of this into writing. Not only do I lack the language to communicate this (more on that later), but I know that the act of communication, makes the situation more real to me, thus putting me in the predicament of being even more inarticulate with my emotions.

Not only that, but the information from a live blood analysis I got on Friday keeps getting obscured and overwhelmed by the more immediate impact of Monday's discoveries at my consultation with the OBGYN surgeon about my fibroids.

This could be a very disjointed post.

Facts, as presented to me by the microbiologist who did my live blood analysis on Friday: I have Rouleaux, which is a blood condition where my red blood cells link themselves together (in my case, tightly stacked horizontally in long chains--like candy necklaces) and (in my case) form weblike structures. As you might imagine, this causes some basic problems. Like the inability of oxygen to easily travel around in the blood. Other issues showed up in the analysis, but the Rouleax is the big one, and is probably the first domino. Symtoms of Rouleaux are things like constant immune reactions, increased allergic responses, and fatigue. Causes of Rouleaux can be...tumors.

Which brings us to--

Facts, as presented to me by the OBGYN surgeon on Monday: The fibroid Dr. Harris found is much larger than I thought/understood. It's as big as my uterus and has basically taken over the entire back muscle of the organ. It is inoperable and cannot be removed. There is another, smaller fibroid and a polyp in my cervical canal. This might be operable, but the removal would be superfluous in light of the presence of the other, larger fibroid. I think we can all make the connection to that fibryod cyst (a type of tumor) to my painful and heavy periods. But can I make a connection between it and my autoimmune disease (and everything that has gone along with that)? Maybe. I'm using this as my own way to understand, so just come along for the ride with me, here, and tell me if you think I'm off-base.

My current thoughts on how I got here:

Hormonal birth control fucked me up. Studies are showing that HBC takes a serious toll on one's body, especially the adrenals. I believe it. I never had serious health problems or even environmental allergies until I was in my late to mid-20s. I mean, I was kind of frail, but I was active and high energy, if not athletic. I realize allergic developments in one's twenties is a fairly common thing, but you can't deny there's allergies and then there's my allergies. Anyway. I know the pill made me literally and immediately sick because the last several months I took them (nearly two years) were a constant search for a brand/dosage that didn't give me morning sickness. I'd been on them for years (nearly a dozen) before I finally gave up and started taking DepoProvera shots. All it takes is looking at a calendar to point to the fact that my thyroid issues started up right around the same time I started getting Depo shots. I point to HBC (the pills and the shots) as the thing that jump-started my autoimmune problems (allergies) and thyroid/endocrine issues (glandular stresses). I believe hormonal birth control is largely responsible, if not the number one direct cause, of my health issues today. Guess what the OBGYN surgeon told me was the only other option for dealing with fibroids like this, apart from a hysterectomy? Hormonal birth control.

I am faced with the choice of removing an organ that I very much do not want to remove, or put into my body (for basically the rest of my life, or until I remove the organ) what probably caused 90% of my daily health problems today.

I am taking both these items of information (yeah, both—see, you forgot about the Rouleaux business too, there, didn’t ya?) to Drs. Khosh and Jonah, but I need to make my decision within three weeks or I’m screwed insurance-wise. Anyway, I can’t imagine any herbal treatment that actually shrink and remove cysts. If I’m wrong on that, pipe up in the comments, but I want solid research and reviewed reports, not hippie websites.

Whew. I feel better. Not good. I don’t feel like I just got punched in the stomach, at least. It makes it more real, but it also makes it a little easier.

Yesterday, when I was dealing with the emotional fallout from the surgeon’s report (as well as the physical discomfort from having a fucking uterine biopsy), I had no idea how I was going to write about this. I even groaned to [ profile] mckitterick, I have to write about this. He told me I’d feel better afterward, and I have to admit I scoffed. A little. But now that I’ve written it out, now that I have my language for it, it is easier to process. He was right. I can’t emotionally process something without appropriate language. I guess it comes as no surprise that communicating basic facts about my situation is the best way for me to emotionally process it (Vulcan 4lyfe).

So here we are at a new stage of Finnegan Begin Again. This time, it's a physical crisis coupled with emotional growth! My favorite.
clevermanka: default (ass2)
Still coughing (productive cough, gross), but my throat isn't as sore, and energy levels are better. I usually have a sinus pressure headache by evening, though. [ profile] mckitterick started feeling a sore throat last night, poor guy.

I've determined our mysterious skin-nibblers are pin oak mites. I didn't get a single bite during the four days I spent indoors during my convalescence, but after my walk home from work yesterday, I have four. Two on my neck (ugh), one on my right side near the bottom of my ribs, and one just under my left armpit. I hope the one on my neck doesn't bruise like the one on my right arm, which is still a two-inch across discoloration two weeks later. They all itch so bad. Even the old, bruised one still itches occasionally. Lucky me, I get to walk to and fro across campus twice today, and then walk home. Can't wait to see what I wake up with tomorrow. I'll try showering as soon as I get home. See if that helps.

Despite my comparative non-compliance with the prescribed exercises this month (too tired to do them twice a day), PT guy Tim was happy with my progress. I tested negative for both labrum and SI joint/sciatic inflammation. We spent a lot of time (drumroll, please!) working on setup for deadlift. He showed me some small adjustments I can make to allow for tight hips and ankles that will protect my knees and back.

But before I start lifting anything, I'll be working on increasing my general stamina by...walking. PT guy Tim told me to limit walks to a half mile at first and pay close attention to my gait. When it starts to change/falter, I need to slow down or stop. I heard there was a small indoor track at the free (old, cheap) gym available to faculty/staff, but I've never seen it and I don't know if it's still open. Waiting on a call back about that. No way am I taking outside walks any more than I need to. If the indoor track thing falls through, I might just use my lunch break to walk around the upstairs part of my building (where I do my hourly walkabout). It's only 1/6 of a mile so gets kind of dull, but it's better than being eaten alive.

I'm also feeling a little more confident about resuming yoga after the all-clear. I won't be doing anything fancy. None of that wonderful prep for hanuamnasana for a while, but some nice, gentle hip-openers with basic strengthening poses will be good.

Movement in general will be good. Not being able to exercise/feel strong has a negative influence on my eating habits. I don't like to police my eating, but with an eating disorder, I do have to be aware of my eating habits. I let those slip somewhat egregiously over the last six months. I'm honestly a bit concerned about fitting into last year's winter clothes so it's time to reverse that trend before I switch out the seasonal wardrobes.

Current goal: Fitting back into the jeans I'm wearing in that icon.
clevermanka: default (bonecruncher)
Because I need another crafting project: Do Something With The Tiniest Scraps! Thanks, [ profile] msmitti!

If you like Thirty Seconds to Mars (Jared Leto's band), I found a website that has some electronica remixes of their songs.

For those of you who think we aren't on the cusp of living in 1984...wake up, kiddos.

I don't wanna jinx anything, but my energy levels are WAY up this week. I'm kinda worn out but not fucking beat when I get home from work in the evenings. I think Dr. Jonah's new supplementation schedule is working. Also, I'm sleeping through the night, probably due to the new progesterone tincture I got from Dr. Khosh on Friday.

clevermanka: default (against the ropes)
I didn't sleep well again. I couldn't fall asleep last night (very unusual for me), and then I had stress dreams again. Including several times of me forgetting I had to fast for this morning's bloodwork lab and getting frustrated about having to spit out my food, rinse my mouth, etc. Ugh. Stress dreams. Please stop.

So I was already fatigued going into the lab, and the phlebotomist who's been there for ages and has always been great...I dunno something he did today really hurt. And because I have so many tests being done, I had to fill four vials with a super uncomfortable needle. Ouch.

Then I had my appointment with the doctor to talk to her about my menstrual issues. Well. She agreed with everyone's diagnosis about possible fibroids, and said I needed to get an ultrasound and she could see if they had any openings that morning. Lucky me, they did, so I found myself drinking a lot of water to prep for that ultrasound which wasn't bad. It was the surprise transvaginal ultrasound that sucked. It's no surprise that women who haven't had children have somewhat narrower cervices, and it took a lot of effort to get things up in there for the sound wand to pick anything up. The best part of it was I (hopefully for the one and only time in my life) got to use a "that's what she said" during a gynecological exam.

A girl's gotta keep her sense of humor when presented with an unexpected invasive medical procedure.

Anyway, they found one sizeable fibroid (7-8mm) and a bonus polyp! Apparently my uterus decided it was going to grow something before it expired, by god. So they're gonna contact me in the next week or so to schedule surgery to evict the unwanted squatters.

Then I went to the dentist where I told one of my old fillings (where the enamel on a molar wore thin ages ago) is aging and it looks like there's some decay under it. So I get to take care of that in a couple weeks, too.

Because the dentist took longer than usual (I usually take less time than normal at the dentist because I'm usually problem free there), I didn't have time to stop at home for lunch on my way to KC for PT and Dr. Jonah.

Of course, I was still fasting from the morning bloodwork. I swung by Natural Grocer's on my way out of town for something and in the five minutes I had, I grabbed a fruit-nut bar and an Epic bar, which I hate because to me they have the texture of being pre-chewed but god I needed some fucking protein already.

Physical therapy was...fine, I guess. He didn't see as much progress as he expected, I don't think, and my honesty in telling him about some regression of healing in both my hip and back (I've had some discomfort sitting crosslegged and my SI joint/sciatic nerve thing has flared up the past couple days) meant the lifting prepwork has been pushed back a bit.

Thank god everything went okay with Dr. Jonah. It was just a regular flow/adjustment session, though. We have our consultation on Monday, which we're doing via Skype. Here's hoping that goes okay, just from a technological level.

And now I'm going to eat some dinner and pour myself a fucking drink most definitely not in that order.

Brain fog

Aug. 26th, 2015 11:25 am
clevermanka: default (post-dance)
Last week's energy level high didn't last long. I'm struggling this week. Getting ready for bed at 9:00, asleep by 9:30, still waking up exhausted. And this headache. God. It's been rolling around up there for a week and a half and I have no clue why it's there or how to make it leave for more than a day at a time. I'm puffy and bloated, too. Picked the wrong day to wear a body-conscious dress. It's pressing so tight against my abdomen you can see the outline of my bellybutton. I hate that.

There are many things I'd like to talk about, but I don't have the brain energy or focus to write about them and that's frustrating, too. I was talking to [ profile] mckitterick about how it's often a physical effort for me to engage my mind at any level beyond barely functional. When I'm fatigued, all my mental energy goes to staying on top of things at my job. That means there's nothing left for engaging socially--either in person or on the internet. I hate it.

In other news:

I know it doesn't mean anything, but it's still cool.
clevermanka: default (made-up 2)
And this is why I drive all the way to fucking Kansas City, Missouri to see Tim the PT guy.

I don't like to think of my avoidance of certain things as boycotting because I don't usually encourage others to do the same. That shit is personal and nobody needs to feel bad for shopping places when that's all that's available/affordable. But I do believe my dollar is my vote and if you want to know why I don't buy from Amazon and I why request that people don't buy me things from Amazon either, here's yet another reason why. Fuck you, Amazon.

Mad Max Meta about different ways to be a mother.

Patrick Stewart, out there destroying toxic masculinity one person at a time.

Ronda Rousey, god damn. Just. God. Damn.

On the physical self-care front, there is definite movement in the positive direction. My energy levels are much better. This past week I had energy to do stuff after work three out of five days (well, I hope three out of five--I'm thinking positive because there's an event I want to attend tonight). My physical stamina is improving, too. I walked from first to fourth floor on Wednesday and wasn't wiped out at the top! I got winded going up just one flight the very next day, but these things go in cycles and an occasional victory is better than no victories at all. Pain-wise, things are definitely better. I have only small aches in my left hip instead of lightning bolts of despair (the labrum injury) and my right back twinge is lessening thanks to Tim the PT guy deciding it's definitely a nerve injury issue and starting treatment for that. He thinks it's possible that when I pulled my back on the deadlift (god that seems so long ago), my sciatic nerve and a disc got pulled slightly out of their grooves along with the soft tissue injury and while the soft tissues healed, the nerve and disc are still rubbing each other the wrong way. All the mobility work I've done on it has actually been detrimental (ugh) which explains why I've been feeling worse on days after I do yoga. So we're working on getting them to play happily with themselves and sometime soon (perhaps as soon as September) we're staring prep work for returning to lifting heavy things.

You guys I got a bit choked up and teary thinking about being behind a barbell again. Seriously, I am almost crying at my desk here.

The people at the State Fair were kind enough to refund my tickets so I'm buying tickets to see Joan Jett at the Sprint Center in December. No travel, no hotel expense, no worrying about food, and [ profile] mckitterick can go with us. Also, she's the opening act at that show, so unless my concert buddies want to stay for The Who (unlikely), we can skedaddle out of there early. It's win all around.

I hate that even such a small thing as a day trip to a city three hours away presents such an ordeal for me. I don't know that I'll ever be able to enjoy traveling just to travel. I need to have a reason for travel beyond just sightseeing and that reason needs to be pretty damn motivating. This is a little sad-making because I believe travel is wonderful and important for self-development, but god it's just such a trial for me (for various reasons).

With my energy levels (I hope) improving, though, I look forward to doing more things close to home. Workshops, shows, even more regular hang-outs with locals.

Tonight I'm going to Dances With Hippies (provided I am not absolutely dead on my feet come quitting time). It's been ages since I went to one of these things and I'm especially excited about this one. The Sunday morning one I used to attend has shifted music focus to stuff I'm not always wild about, but from what I was told, the DJ for this event leans more toward electronica so Fuck Yeah. Also, Westside Yoga is my favorite open movement space in town, with good ventilation and a high ceiling so the patchouli funk won't be overpowering. It's where they hold the occasional kirtans I attend, too. Such a nice place.

Final good thing for today: My hair looks FANTASTIC. Perhaps alas, I don't yet know how to get a photo off my phone (or even...take a photo with my phone?) and also my hair doesn't photograph well. You'll have to take my word for it.
clevermanka: default (post-dance)
Something I forgot to mention in my earlier posts about Con*Strict was the vid show. I la-la-la-love fanvids, and this was my first con with a vid show. It's not surprising how group watching escalated the feels--just like watching a movie or a concert with a large, receptive audience intensifies the experience.

Here's one of the vids from the Con*Strict vid show, done by one of the attending members. It was my favorite for two reasons which are not difficult to determine.

More of my fave vids from the show )

Yesterday I wore one of my re-fashioned outfits (a dress made from pieces of four tee shirts) with a pair of bloomers underneath (just long enough for the lace to peek out from under the dress). I felt like I was in my PJs all day. I'm looking forward to having more of those in my closet. Also looking forward to the practice (from making my own) so I can start making them to sell. I'm going to need to invest in a small mannequin for that, so if anyone local sees one for cheap, let me know. This is not as outrageous of a request as it seems--Lawrence has some unlikely thrift and dumpster finds.

Speaking of style, I avoid wearing gloves as a fashion statement because I think they're a little fussy (it's hard to actually do anything while wearing them). Fingerless gloves would solve a lot of the problem, but they've always seemed so...pretentious. These might change my mind. Fuck pretentious. Those are JEWELRY. I mean, Christ, just look at those things.

One of the reasons I've never considered becoming a yoga instructor is that the market is so glutted here in Lawrence. A conversation with [ profile] ms_danson made me wonder about the possibility of doing a yoga podcast, though. I picture a website that has a basic dictionary of poses as well as individual pages on the site. Each page would have a list of images of the particular poses for whatever the focus of that page's series, and a link to listen or download a voice narration for the series. People could request a theme, goal, or focus for a series once a month or something. Doesn't that sound great? Now there's motivation to do a teacher training course. Someday. In my copious spare time with all my excess energy.

Energy levels are still shit, and the ridges in my fingernails are back. The index and middle fingernails have them now, too. The thumbnails look and feel like washboards. Ugh. So demoralizing. I see Dr. Jonah on Thursday and I'm going to talk about re-upping my mineral supplements that we started decreasing two months ago. I feel like earlier this summer my energy levels were better. I'm done with waking up tired. This regressing business is for the birds.

We shopped for phones last night. It was hellish. I think I'm going to wind up with a Galaxy S6. [ profile] mckitterick is price shopping because for what we want, it's cheaper to buy our own unlocked phones and get a month-to-month plan through T-Mobile (which is what some local friends did who are very happy with their service). I have to admit, these newfangled phones are awful pretty. And it will be nice to have a phone that doesn't randomly turn itself back on. Or refuse to disable the Mute function. But oh my goodness they're so difficult for me to use. Touch screens do not react well to my skin, and there's something about my electrical charge that makes things go a little nutty. When someone asks me to take a picture with their phone, it always turns off or goes to a different screen or something. Beyond that, though, there's my concern about having internet access 24/7. I'm honestly relieved that the Tumblr phone app is so bad because I see myself easily becoming That Person.

Tomorrow I am a panelist for the Kansas Women’s Leadership Institute conference. Last year I served as a panelist on a university-wide presentation for graduate-level support staff and was in the pilot group for KU's new online catalog software (a nine-month project). I need to remember to put this shit in my end-of-year review. I don't think anyone (including myself) realizes how much I actually do around here.

Which...I guess I should do something now to prepare for tomorrow's presentation.
clevermanka: default (shake shake shake)
Thanks to those who offered insight and experiences on yesterday's question about my menstrual stuff. I'm so glad to be at a point in my life where I am comfortable talking about a normal body function without being embarrassed. Sincere appreciation to those friends who are in the same place with me. I think I'm going to mention these issues to my doctor next time I see her, but I'm not going to worry about it too much for now.

This Breaking Muscle article about how we perceive our daily activity affects our health is fascinating.

If you're a Kindle owner and want a new cookbook (and aren't vegetarian), consider picking up Melissa Joulwan's two amazing contributions to the Paleo Eating community. They're on sale for $1.99 each on Kindle right now.

There is talk of a few crafting panels at Con*Strict, including origami and a make-a-purse-from-a-book. Y'all, I might have found my people.

Today's my last day at the office this week.

clevermanka: default (wrestler)
Doing my exercises this evening, I remembered something about the timing of my left hip pain over the last five years. It was terrible right before I started doing CrossFit--the worst it had ever been. Sometimes the pain kept me from sleeping. I had diagnoses of bursitis, piriformis syndrome, and sciatica. None of the treatments for any of them helped. When I joined CrossFit, the first thing the coaches did was teach me how to squat correctly and after just a few weeks of regular bodyweight squats, my hip felt better. It continued to feel better as long as I continued to do squats. Then I hurt my back and can't do squats comfortably without losing form less than halfway down, and now my hip hurts again.

So I don't know if that's coincidental. Until now I just thought it was a steady regression of my general physical health, but now I wonder if there's a stronger connection, there.

Anyway. Just thought that might help with treatment and I was pretty sure I wouldn't remember this next week.

Thanks for the e-mail. History like that helps us put the pieces together in terms of what will be the best approach to treating you going forward.

My initial thought after reading your e-mail about squatting at your CrossFit gym was that you were probably on the right track until your back injury derailed your training. Good squat form requires huge contribution from your glute max. One of the other primary roles of your glute max is keeping the femoral head (the ball of your upper leg bone) centered in the acetabulum (otherwise known as the hip socket) when you flex and extend your hip. Without good glute strength, you have less control of the femoral head in the hip socket. The most common result is what you're experiencing now, pain in the front of the hip.

The road back, in terms of healing your hip and your back, is re-establishing good firing and control through full hip range with the glute max. We're on the right track as far as that is concerned. Remember that good muscle strength in any area of the body, takes a lot longer than the typical doctor or trainer would lead you to believe. If we look at muscle adaptation at the cellular level, we know that it takes about 90 days to replace all of those muscle cells. The stimulus you provide during this time (whether it's exercise or inactivity) dictates how these cells adapt and either get stronger or weaker. Another consideration is that strength is in large part dictated by the strength of your tendons (the tissue that connects muscle to bone). The cellular replacement timeline for tendon is even longer than muscle, with turnover happening at a rate of once every 200 days or so (this timeline also applies for ligament and fascial layer turnover, as well).

Hope this provides you some insight and encouragement. I believe we can get you stronger and decrease your pain. You're already helping yourself tremendously from day to day by varying your body position regularly.

Have a great weekend and as always, give me a shout with any other questions or concerns.
clevermanka: default (ass2)
Tim the PT guy thinks I've damaged my labrum. He's not sure if it's just inflamed or if I've torn it. After a week of my current, revised exercises he'll check in and depending how things are progressing, he'll recommend me for an MRI to see if it's actually torn. Please gods don't let it be torn.

In the meantime, I'm supposed to take it easy to get the worst of the inflammation down. No more banded distraction stretches, and for a couple days not much walking/hip socket movement. I'm not even supposed to stand too much. Also a new movement that will (hopefully) train my glutes to fire better because apparently my quads are still doing, like, 90% of the work on all my lower body movements. For such a large ass, it sure is lazy.

I have an additional exercise for my right SI joint that is basically me lying down in a specific configuration on pillows for fifteen minutes two to three times a day. That's nice!

My weekend plans to start the altered Furiosa portrait are canceled, now, because I do my collage art while standing at my cutting table. Hmph. Unless someone has a cushy, comfy bar stool I could borrow....
clevermanka: default (bonecruncher)
I got some clarification from [ profile] frugurl27 in the comments yesterday and then this morning in an email from KU's HR department about the furloughs and they will affect us in regards to the new fiscal year, starting June 7. So I still have a paycheck coming. That's nice!

Also nice: Last night I had enough energy after dinner to work on a new apron. My old one was (frankly) disgusting from nearly ten years of use and stains. I didn't quite get it done, but I'll be able to wrap it up tonight if my energy levels are similar to yesterday. But after last night's thunderstorms (at 3:00a and again at 4:30a), that's...not a certainty.

Also also nice: My left hip is hurting much less. It's only a teensy bit sore/achey now instead of nearly-debilitating. The improvement is, I think, a combination of starting to lose a bit of weight after a week of conscientious eating, easing up a bit on the PT exercises, and not sleeping with a pillow under my knees.

Someone on FB shared this with me today: Rejected Princesses. I'm not sure I like attaching the term "princess" to most of these women (and I'm not sure they would either), but the website itself is great.

Anybody who is on Tumblr these days (at least in the circles I'm in) knows it's kind of All Tom Hardy All The Time which is a nice change. I am 100% thrilled to see his face instead of Blenderdick Candycrush's (admittedly pretty but not as interesting to me) mug plastering my dash. Here's a sample of what I'm seeing for probably thirty to forty percent of my dash these days:


There are so few people around the building this morning that the motion-activated lights in the hall outside my office just turned off.


Miss Piggy honored with a Sackler Center First Award from the Elizabeth A. Sackler Center for Feminist Art at the Brooklyn Museum

Gonna wrap this up with a story about yesterday. There's this house between mine and campus. It's always been a rental and it's always been little sketchy. Cinderblock construction, overgrown front yard, beer bottles and overflowing ashtrays on the porch, you get the idea. Lately there's been a really nice 70s Honda motorcycle sitting outside and once or twice I've seen a guy working on it. A few weeks ago I passed the house when the garage was open and it was packed with maybe ten ratty old bikes with maybe some scooters mixed in. Just a ton of junked-out bikes. So obviously this person does repairs/restorations and if that Honda is any indication, he's pretty good. Yesterday, someone posted to this to a local FB group. That's totally this guy's bike. So I thought I'd stop by on my way home and see if the dude was home and let him know. As I was walking up to the door, I had that This Is A Terrible Idea feeling. The house was dark and even the front smelled (from the beer bottles and overflowing ashtrays). There was yard work stuff piled in the doorway, covered in cobwebs and dirt, and the storm door was broken and hung open. The doorbell was broken, too, and when I knocked on the inside door I was honestly relieved that nobody answered. Fucking creepy house.

And that's the story of how I avoided being the victim of an axe murderer this week.
clevermanka: default (freakout)
THIS JUST IN. Got published yesterday. Huge medical news, y'all. Huge. I'm pasting the whole article here, but if you want to read or share the original story link, it's here, along with a lot of explanatory links. Click here for archived text )
clevermanka: default (ass2)
I'm so excited! I love three day weekends, and I get to start this one a little early, even. Today is a half day at work for me. I'm off at noon to get my hair cut. It's getting pretty straggly and even though I like the wild rat-nest look, I want a healthy rat nest, you know? Right after that, I'm off to Warrensburg, MO, to pick up my entire hog that I bought this year (previously I've only bought a half). So. Much. Pork. It's kind of a long drive (about an hour and a half), but this pork is special. And their sausage blend has nothing in it I can't eat. AMAZING. And DELICIOUS.

I had a follow-up session with Star on Wednesday and my hips are already so much better. I had a few hours where I was just freezing that evening, and yes, we're having colder than normal weather right now, but I was inside and under blankets for godssake. I remember the same weird chill happened last time, too, only a day later. Things seem to be on an accelerated schedule this time around. Neat!

Although I've been diligent in my physical therapy exercises, my yoga practice has fallen by the wayside lately. I've been trying to stock up on time with [ profile] mckitterick before he takes off for his annual Month of Unavailability. He's at the local SF convention this weekend, though, and starting May 31 he'll be gone most evenings and weekends. I'll be using that time to re-incorporate my yoga practice. I'm looking forward to it.

I'm also looking forward to a month of not cooking dinners on a regular basis. I enjoy making dinner for us most nights, but it'll be good to have a few weeks of eating pre-prepped Bowl of Food in the evening instead of using that time to cook and then clean. It'll also be a chance for me to clean up my act eating-wise. I'm just gonna put all the nuts in a cabinet and consider it off limits. I might re-arrange the kitchen a bit so those items aren't right at eye-level, too. Just put all the snack stuff for [ profile] mckitterick in one cabinet and then let it become invisible to me. Oh, the weird little tricks I have to play on myself sometimes when it comes to food. Goes to show you never really get over an eating disorder, I guess.

The collection of Mad Max articles is going up on Tuesday, the day after Memorial Day, along with a Tumblr collection of Mad Max articles, gifs, and commentary. If you've got anything you think would make a good contribution, please leave a link in the comments!


May. 19th, 2015 10:10 am
clevermanka: default (blah)
My hips are getting sore and stiff again. Hurray for seeing Star again tomorrow! And the PT guy, and Dr. Jonah--it's a long morning in KC for me. In a way, it's kind of cool that the issue is returning. Very few issues are solved in a single fix-it session, and this slight regression somehow makes the healing process more real.

Here are more office stretches that you don't even need to leave your desk to do.

There are squirrels or birds (or both) in the dropped ceiling at the office. This happens every year. Oh, spring.

I've been eating for crap lately and I can't be assed to care. Last night I had a green salad with dried fruit, toasted almonds, and chopped strawberries. For dessert (like I needed dessert--that salad was sweet enough to be a dessert), apple slices with almond butter. WTF, self. There's this stuff called protein. And remember how you're supposed to limit your intake of raw food? Yeah.

Today's Tumblr is Tuesday, May 19: Rain.


clevermanka: default (Default)

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