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clevermanka ([personal profile] clevermanka) wrote2019-01-18 09:35 am
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Friday Update

On cm.net Wednesdays are (supposedly) more for updates on How We Are Dealing With Our Shit, and Fridays are an Open Thread for Shooting the Shit. Different days, different shit. Since I don't expect people here to follow me there (although I appreciate those who do both!) I'm gonna combine the general info in my comments on those posts here on Fridays. I hope it'll make me more disciplined/inclined to post Actual Content here on a regular basis.

The top floor of my building is an unbroken rectangular hallway (with classrooms branching off) that's about a sixth of a mile around. I had grand aspirations to walk around it twice every hour. I used to do this every day. It's a nice way to get some movement into my day. Except not, apparently, yet. After two days of it, my body is worn out and aching (in the "my joints are on fire" way, not the "mmmm DOMS hurts so good" way). The brain fog settled in around 1pm yesterday and is still lingering a bit. So I'm subbing the walking around with some simple stretches and PT movements every hour. It's...not the same.

In addition to, you know, not having my body completely deteriorate (like my mom's and nana's), I really want to lose some fat--just enough so I can fit back into a few items of clothing. Yesterday morning I put on a sweater that I haven't worn in ages, only to be reminded of why I haven't worn it (too tight). There's also a pair of leggings that make my ass look SO GOOD but my waist is about two inches too big for them to be comfortable right now. Also, [personal profile] mckitterick posted a pic of us from our 2016 NYC trip on his FB this week where my cheekbones look amazing and I would like them back, please. VANITYYYYY

But I'm fully aware of the fact that age + health + science that affirms the difficulty with achieving and maintaining weight loss means I might not ever see that size again. Which I wouldn't mind so much if it didn't mean losing so many awesome clothes. I mean, I can always buy new clothes, but I mostly shop at thrifts and a lot of these pieces are irreplaceable (as are the cheekbones).

For those who maybe followed me here from Tumblr and/or haven't known me since LJ days, I have Hashimoto's and a cascade of related health problems (chronic fatigue, GI issues top the list and influence everything else). I haven't really felt well since about, uh, 2004 and even then things were not great all the time (things first started to go wrong with my body around 1998). So I'll be talking about my health here A Lot because it takes up A Lot of my life. *emoji shrug*
anarfea: Jim Moriarty in Sherlock's Coat (Default)

[personal profile] anarfea 2019-01-18 11:25 pm (UTC)(link)
I feel your pain. I've been struggling with my weight and my body image too recently. I don't have the health problems you do. I'm so sorry, it sounds like a bitch of a disease.