clevermanka (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
clevermanka) wrote2003-09-24 09:05 am
clevermanka) wrote2003-09-24 09:05 am
Entry tags:
A sad day
You have to read the above title in the little mouse voices from Babe, ok? I'll give you a second to go back and re-read it.
>suck the helium< A...Saaaad...Daaaaaay >exhale the helium<
Mind, this is only a sad day for me. No world tragedies (no new ones at least, as of 9:00 a.m. CST), no famous deaths (again, yet). No, my dears, it's just that...hangs head I'm having a Fat Day.
Yesterday we had a special dance class with a guest instructor in from California. She was energetic and funny in a surprisingly crude manner. She was incredibly well-muscled yet soft and curvy at the same time. She was absolutely gorgeous.
And with the exception of the two pregnant women, I was the biggest girl there. Add to that the fact that the room was swelteringly hot, and those of you who know me in person know that I sweat when I get warm. A *lot*. So not only was I the fattest girl there, I was pouring buckets of sweat, my hair was plastered to my head, and my harem pants were stuck to the backs of my legs. And *then* add the fact that my layered shimmies *suck* (this is my own fault so that's minor, really), and I felt so graceless and ugly.
The feeling has carried over into today, especially since the scale says I'm up six fucking pounds today. What the hell. Like I needed *that*. My allergies still aren't any better and I'm about to that point where if I had periods, I'd feel like I was getting PMS. I'm stupidly emotional and worn out from maintaining a facade of okay-ness when really I just want to crawl into bed and cry. Except that would exacerbate the sinus problem.
A big hug and smootch to D, who tells me over and over again that I am the most beautiful girl in the world and he will love me even if I never lose another inch or pound. Whatta guy.
This is not a cry for soothing words and pat-patting (although of course, I'll take them if you're offering). Just wanted to get it off my chest, even though I'd prefer to get it off my thighs.
Christina Aguilera's "Beautiful" just came on the radio here at work. It's good to know that even when things are sucky, the universe reminds you that it does have a sense of humor.
>suck the helium< A...Saaaad...Daaaaaay >exhale the helium<
Mind, this is only a sad day for me. No world tragedies (no new ones at least, as of 9:00 a.m. CST), no famous deaths (again, yet). No, my dears, it's just that...hangs head I'm having a Fat Day.
Yesterday we had a special dance class with a guest instructor in from California. She was energetic and funny in a surprisingly crude manner. She was incredibly well-muscled yet soft and curvy at the same time. She was absolutely gorgeous.
And with the exception of the two pregnant women, I was the biggest girl there. Add to that the fact that the room was swelteringly hot, and those of you who know me in person know that I sweat when I get warm. A *lot*. So not only was I the fattest girl there, I was pouring buckets of sweat, my hair was plastered to my head, and my harem pants were stuck to the backs of my legs. And *then* add the fact that my layered shimmies *suck* (this is my own fault so that's minor, really), and I felt so graceless and ugly.
The feeling has carried over into today, especially since the scale says I'm up six fucking pounds today. What the hell. Like I needed *that*. My allergies still aren't any better and I'm about to that point where if I had periods, I'd feel like I was getting PMS. I'm stupidly emotional and worn out from maintaining a facade of okay-ness when really I just want to crawl into bed and cry. Except that would exacerbate the sinus problem.
A big hug and smootch to D, who tells me over and over again that I am the most beautiful girl in the world and he will love me even if I never lose another inch or pound. Whatta guy.
This is not a cry for soothing words and pat-patting (although of course, I'll take them if you're offering). Just wanted to get it off my chest, even though I'd prefer to get it off my thighs.
Christina Aguilera's "Beautiful" just came on the radio here at work. It's good to know that even when things are sucky, the universe reminds you that it does have a sense of humor.