Goal

[clevermanka]

I feel like I don't have goals. Because when I want to do something, I just go do it. I don't classify it or think of it as A Goal. I just start doing whatever it is.

Learn a new art technique. Check.

Take another dance class. Check.

Grow out my hair. Check.

Are these goals? They don't feel like goals. I just decide "Hey I should do this" and then I do it. There's not much planning involved. I've always thought of goals as larger things. Write a novel. Publish a novel. Be successfully self-employed. Go to graduate school. Raise children. Be famous. None of which I have ever wanted to do, by the way. I just want to be free to be happy and content with my life. Which, left to my own devices, I'm pretty good at doing.

Is it a goal if I'm already doing it?

I feel like I don't have Life Goals. I'm usually okay with that. Except at the workshop this weekend it was a huge obstacle, and very frustrating. A major part of several journal entries was to focus on goals. And...um, Drinking More and Wearing More Jewelry didn't really fit the point of the exercises.

mckitterick tells me that I have goals, but when I look at his goals (having a positive effect on humanity, creating something that will change the way people think, saving the world, etc. etc. etc.) anything I actually feel like doing...well, it doesn't really fit under the same umbrella, you know?

I don't need to compare myself to other people to define myself, and I certainly don't set my standards or sense of self by other people's definitions, and obviously my goals are not going to be everybody else's goals, but I'm coming to the realization that I don't even understand the idea of goals. Here's what should be a really simple word/concept and I haven't the foggiest how to deal with it.

So, I guess Goal #1: Figure out what is a goal?

Comments

[red-tess.livejournal.com]

Eh. I don't have Big Dreams. But I do have a Big Life. And, I'm extremely practical - very grounded in the here and now. I intensely dislike exercises that try to force a largesse of planning or goal-setting - mission or vision - that ignores the reality of the constantly shifting ground upon which I live. That being said, I'm generally know as the logistician of the group. Talk about a foot in both worlds. :)

In our seminars, we teach SMART goals (specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and timely) - these are either short- or long-term goals. I tend to think that's overplanning, but it works for some folks. Sometimes, I know it's merely about changing a habit/rut that you can't/don't want to/don't have to set goals to actually writing them down, articulating them, whatever - and then you discover that you have goals, and you always had goals - you just never called them that. And I remember that Harvard study that correlated written goals to success. Interesting.

My personal Vision says more about the archetypes that govern my Person and less about where I'm going. It serves merely as a touchstone for integrity. I re-write Vision to accommodate changes. And sometimes, Vision just guides a particular project (it really helps when doing a Big project with a team, for example). Again, more about BE-ing, less about DO-ing. Too much value (IMHO) gets attached to the DO-ing, hence the emphasis on the importance of goalsetting.

I do like having a Theme for my Story...it appeals to the ritualist in me, I think. More Jungian/pattern-based/bardic than being a statistician of the accomplishments of my years. Or something.

Yes?

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

I remember that Harvard study that correlated written goals to success

Seeing as how I imagine people at Harvard are very into writing things down I have to wonder if this study was maybe a teensy bit skewed.

[red-tess.livejournal.com]

You think?
Studies can be made to say anything, that's what I think. :)

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

I recently heard someone talking about a study where people who wore expensive shoes were more prone to foot problems because they were hesitant to wear down the soles of the shoes because they were walking funny, and thus throwing off their natural gait.

This was told to me by someone who doesn't like to wear shoes and prefers to go as barefoot as possible after I mentioned that I no longer buy cheap shoes because they fall apart and I find them wasteful.

Whatev.