Goal!

[clevermanka]

Good class discussion yesterday, people. Thanks, all, for participating! Seriously, it was wonderful to get so many points of view and ideas. Hearing how other people perceive goals as well as thoughts on why I might have such difficulty understanding the concept was helpful and revelatory.

It basically comes down to two main points:

1. Putting thoughts and concepts into words does not come easily to me. It's a learned skill, and a recently learned skill at that. So if goals are personal desires given a definition that is understandable and communicable to other people, it's no wonder I was having a difficult time with the concept. I rarely, if ever, articulate my personal desires--even to myself. I just know/feel it. My brain does not naturally communicate with words at any level higher than basic communication. Talking about feelings = very hard for me. Not hard because I'm embarrassed or shy. Hard because, although I might have the intellectual vocabulary, it's difficult to assign those words to emotional senses. So while I have no problem talking about task/project "goals" (fitness-, art-, sewing-, or other-wise related stuff) it's completely foreign for me to talk about internal desires (being content, happy) or even visualizing those ... goals ... (it's still difficult for me to internalize such things as "Goals") as something other than just a vague feeling buried in my brain.

2. I don't need to assign or articulate goals any differently than I've been doing all my life. I feel like I'm (in general) a fairly well-adjusted being and I'm (in general) happy with life. However, adding an understanding of the concept of Goals can help me understand a different way to approach life. And looking at something from another's point of view has, I think, hurt very few people in history.

Some key phrases from yesterday that I'm going to try to incorporate, at least in my general understanding of the term goal, if not in my actual vocabulary:

Areas in which I want to achieve results
Framework and focus for energy
Directed motivation

In a remarkable happenstance of "just-when-I-needed-it", please take a moment to read pointoforigin's post about a possible meaning of life. It's beautiful. And perfect.

Comments

[rowangolightly.livejournal.com]

Eh, sorry I missed out on the discussion yesterday.

I attended a wonderful seminar when I was a teenager, about evaluating self-worth, setting goals and personal enrichment. It made a HUGE impact upon me, in learning to recognize the successes in my life and how to recreate them. It started with each of us listing 10 great attributes that we each have; you know how hard that is to do, in a society that stomps on self-praise?

Anyway, it taught us how to identify goals; short term, long term and to evaluate them precisely in the terms that RedTess used, "specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and timely."

Since then, my take on goals has always been "how do you get where you want to be if you don't have a plan as to how to get there."

At my age now, the goals are more project-oriented but they still exist. Otherwise, I'd just get up on the morning and spend all day on LiveJournal.

Oh wait...

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

It started with each of us listing 10 great attributes that we each have; you know how hard that is to do, in a society that stomps on self-praise?

Ha! See, one of the other journal exercises was to write out things you like about yourself. I would've had no problems with that except I ran out of prepped journal pages. I was going to (and still might) make a page with "I AM FUCKING AWESOME" spelled out across the top.

No problems for me in that arena, at least.

[rowangolightly.livejournal.com]

I think it never hurts to remind ourselves of the successes we've had and the stuff we're good at.

*hee* Maybe we should all make a page with "I AM FUCKING AWESOME" spelled out across the top!

*hugs*

[bestill.livejournal.com]

"I AM FUCKING AWESOME"

I LOVE that! And I think you should do it! And I think it's great that you think you are fucking awesome! I think you are fucking awesome, and I think I'm fucking awesome too! But the difference between us, is that it was a very long road for me to get there. And I think that's the case with most people. I think you are an exception that you don't have all the insecurities that make most people think that they aren't awesome.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

We should have an I AM FUCKING AWESOME journal day together so we can give each other more ideas about HOW FUCKING AWESOME we are.

[bestill.livejournal.com]

Wouldn't that be a great name for a fun "workshop"--let's all make stuff about how fan-fucking-tabulous we are!

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

Except you'd have to be really careful about the mix of people! Maybe have a group of friends sign up together...

[slinka.livejournal.com]

You have a wonderful mind and heart, you know that? This is a great summing up of your yesterday's post. I was reading along and all I could come up with was, "But I just don't think like that." Internal articulation not being key to how I operate either.

And this: "I'm here to see these things, and I do. No one else will ever have that particular moment of vision. If that's the only point of my life, it seems like a good one." This is just perfect.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

You have a wonderful mind and heart, you know that?

Aw. Thanks, hon. It's good to know I'm not alone in this lack of internal dialogue business. Even better to know I'm in good company.

Bwaaa! Why must we live so far apart???

[nottygypsy.livejournal.com]

I went back and read all the comments to your thread, wow people are way more useful than me. I loved the thread, very thought provoking. Also the link to your friends post, Awesome and so are you!

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

There's always a place for humor! *mwah!*

[nottygypsy.livejournal.com]

Good thing I know my place ;)

[bestill.livejournal.com]

I'm glad that my workshop spurred so much thought and discussion. I do hope though that it didn't make you feel bad or that there was something wrong with you that some of the exercises didn't fit (with you). Generally in those situations where people don't feel it pertains to them or that they have noting to write/journal about, it's because they are in such denial that they are afraid to even open those doors, and they aren't even aware of it. I don't feel that's the case with you. I hope nonetheless that you still got something out of it.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

I definitely did get a lot out of it! I was more frustrated that I couldn't participate in the activity than I was about the fact that I couldn't think of goals.

Heck, I'm ready for another workshop now!