Unsettling

[clevermanka]

I had my second appointment with the endocrinologist yesterday. After looking over the test results, he determined that I have a goiter, which is just too gross to think about, even for me. As my neck is one of the few long and slender parts of me, this information disturbs me greatly and I'm trying to think about it as little as possible. I wasn't even sure I wanted to write about it.

Anyway, the swelling isn't visible, but my TSH levels are on the very low end of normal, and my T-4s are on the high end of normal. The "normal" ranges on these things are huge, though. And the fact that I have an enlarged thyroid gland means that something is definitely wrong, despite my hormones being in the normal range.

A goiter can cause hyperthyroidism (with symptoms such as heart palpitations, tremors, and weight loss), or hypothyroidism (depression, lethargy, and weight gain). Why couldn't I have the hyper version? My mother said I would have been unhappy either way, but at least I might have been unhappy and not 40 pounds overweight.

So I'm on a mid-to-high level dose of Levoxyl for the next two and a half months. Then I'll go back in for more blood work to determine if that's the appropriate dose for me. It seems like a long time to wait, but hopefully I'll start seeing results before then.

In the meantime, I keep squeezing my neck and looking in mirrors and windows to see if I can detect any swelling. The whole idea of having this gland that will never be normal again is just repellant to me. Yuck.

Comments

Re: I know it sucks, but...

[radcliffe.livejournal.com]

oh yes, to the invisible blemishes and body ills!

And it is totally good that you are finding out super early, and hopefully the medication will help you feel better all around etc. Still, that is a scary thing to face. I tell ya, this having body troubles thing sucks.

[mckitterick.livejournal.com]

Good for you catching it so soon! And don't worry -- it's a surprise to us all (truly invisible).

Best,
Chris

[motherteresatoo.livejournal.com]

Ah, I have at least an inkling of how you feel. I have a bunion, which granted doesn't make me gain weight, but it is funky looking, will only get worse, and forced me to get rid of the cutest of my shoes (8 pairs, no less!). I'm glad there is medication for you that will hopefully keep it all in check, and though you have this "issue" I'm glad you found it now.

[kijjohnson.livejournal.com]

Goiters should have the words "honi soit qui mal y pense" embroidered on them. Oh wait, that's garters.

Poor girl! It is invisible, and they're treating you, so all should be well, except for the "alien things growing inside my body" squick factor.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

Yes, I am not ashamed to think this awful gland is evil. =)

And that would be a lot of embroidery on a rather small strip of ribbon...