clevermanka

Sometimes I am a slow learner. Especially when it comes to things I don't want to know. When I wrapped up my Thirty Days of Cipro Festival, I was so happy to be able to eat normally that I was a tad over-exuberant in my food choices. Ten pounds up. I knew I wanted to dance at Smoker looking more like this and less like this, so I followed my tried-and-true method of Eating Fewer Carbs*. Five pounds down since Saturday.

Why oh why do I let myself fall into these habits all the time? I mean, a pizza now and then is fine, but not when it's kept company by chips, submarine sammiches, and sushi. Reach a goal weight and limit yourself to one carby meal a week, girl. It's not that hard. I feel better. I look better. So what if I don't get to stuff my face with exactly what I want, anytime the whim hits me? I mean...seriously? Nnnng. Stupid, stupid.

Just a note: Please don't tell me I "still look great" in the heavier/fatter photo. Just don't. I know how I prefer my body to look. Don't feel you need to comfort me or whatever. I know I'm awesome. Your emotional bolstering is nice, but unnecessary.

Last night I got to see Deke play at Knuckleheads. Little Rachel opened for him. It was the last live music show I'll see before KCRF is over, and it was a great one! Thank gods for bar/club owners who understand that starting a show at 10:00 p.m. (or later) on a weeknight is fucking ridiculous. I bet I was home from Kansas City before most bands headlining in Lawrence took the stage.

Most of the local rockabilly scene seems to have died. I've noticed, the past couple shows, that there are more normals and fewer scenesters. Last night, there were only a handful of the old group in attendance. I understand not dolling up for every show, but not even coming out? To see Deke? Kind of sad when the Local Boy Who Made It Big can't get people to come out. Maybe the $10 cover kept people at home. Dunno. It was weird. I guess most everybody moves on at some point, but I somehow didn't expect it of that group.

I have got to learn to lead swing. Hardly anyone was dancing, and that is a damn shame.

* I should note, eating grain-free and relatively low-carb still results in bloating post-meal. I'm going to have to deal with that again, but not until post-KCRF.

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We talked about going to that show, but room lord wanted a manicure and PDA had homework. Glad you had fun.

I did!

We can listen to Deke's CDs when you come over, so next time he plays KC, you'll know how awesome he is.

I wish I hadn't been yucky, or I'd have loved to have gone and danced witchoo. And see both of those talents.
I'm willing to bet that end of month/not payday yet/$10 and a Tuesday might have had some to do with it.

Carbs are wicked, I think they are made of crack. Put that last year's pic up in the kitchen and go for getting back to it. No comforting here, beeyotch, get your ass in gear.
I could not take my eyes off the way you looked last year, and I do know you worked damn hard at it/gave up a lot to get that way. It's worth it.

Carbs are wicked, I think they are made of crack

No kidding. You know, most carbs are white...

I could not take my eyes off the way you looked last year

Aw. It's good to know I can always count on you for no-nonsense support. Thank you. And it so totally is worth it! Someday I will no longer need constant reminders.

I deeply empathize with your frustration, as I'm up 9 pounds myself thanks to slacking on keeping the carbs cut back. In my case, eating them has the extra added fun of aggravating my guts.

Though, it seems understandable that you were going to sink into the enjoyment of just being able to eat...whatever...after having such a horrible time of it.

May you transition easily back to treating yourself well, and may it bring you back to the body you prefer. If nothing else, wenching and dancing at the faire will help to pull what you want off of you.

D.

Edited 2009-08-26 16:04 (UTC)

it seems understandable that you were going to sink into the enjoyment of just being able to eat...whatever...after having such a horrible time of it.

Yeah. I'm not beating myself up too much about it. Although, really, keeping the binge to a week really should have been enough. A month was excessive. =D

no-nonsense support

HAHA! Pantyhose!

How did we (along with any semblance of fashion sense and taste) survive the 80s?

For me it is is *knowing* that the Eating Fewer Carbs *is* tried and true. Back when I lost the "baby weight" (which was, mind you, three years after the baby, so it was actually nursing weight and, you know, eating whatever I cared to while doing nothing to lose it weight) and did strict Atkins for the first time, I was still quite unbelieving that it would actually work and keep working. It was all so new and novel and exciting that I had no problem sticking to it and losing 40 pounds in little over 3 months.

NOW however I *know* that is possible so it is far too easy for me to know that if I don't start *today*, well, it will work quite well when I start *tomorrow*. And, since it works so well, it will be fine to have french fries this afternoon and just actually start fresh on Monday.

It's as if knowing that it will actually work has completely removed any anxiety I would feel to actually get working it. Bizarre, I know, but true. Frustrating, as well, because it is ridiculous.

Blarg.

I *know* that is possible so it is far too easy for me to know that if I don't start *today*, well, it will work quite well when I start *tomorrow*. And, since it works so well, it will be fine to have french fries this afternoon and just actually start fresh on Monday.

Oh my god, this is totally it. Yes! This is me to a tee!

Me as well.

D.

Well, once disco died, I climbed astride a motorcycle and wore jeans, T's, sweatshirts and leathers until 88, and then I climbed into a truck and ran away around the country until 92. *That's* how I survived it.

Those shoulder pads! It was horrible for those of us who already have shoulders. But I have a weird fondness for the soft jersey blouses, at least they had enough fabric that I wasn't popping buttons across the bust.

Aye for a third. And why not have a toasted English muffin with cream cheese and bacon crumblies before really, really starting it on Monday?

Jesus, lady! Shut your pie hole!

mmmm. Pie.

I cut the shoulder pads out of everything in the 80s. I hated them so much.

now *I* want a quiche! I'm going to settle for goat cheese and bacon-stuffed Portabella mushrooms. whee... very little carbs tonight.

OMG, I think I still have a bunch of the cut out ones in a fabric bin somewhere. I kept thinking "there *must* be a use for these things."

HA!

I cut all mine out, too, and gave them to my Nana. Poor thing has absolutely no shoulders. The 1940s and 1980s were both good fashion decades for her. =D

I love this photo of you.

Hon, you are one of the few people I know who can actually buckle down and do this sort of thing when she wants to. Do you want to? So do it! You've got the evidence.

That said, I cannot help it, you are delicious in both photos. :p

Delicious as in there's enough of me to carve up for a family of four? Definitely.

Edited 2009-08-27 19:39 (UTC)

Hee thanks! In my much younger days...I think I was mmm...
about 28.

You just look so damn pleased with yourself.

I had probably just parked that beastie in some massively tricky way.
That was the first big rig I ever drove for serious pay.

:p Nyah, nyah. You and me both. ;)

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