clevermanka (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
clevermanka) wrote2013-02-20 10:53 am
clevermanka) wrote2013-02-20 10:53 am
Entry tags:
Fifty feet of crap
While I can't really say I'm feeling okay today, I'm feeling better. At least I don't feel liable to break into tears at any given moment. That's honestly the best thing I can say right now. I don't feel like sobbing at this particular time.
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
mckitterick and I talked a little bit last night about this long-lasting slump. My health started taking this turn for the worse in November 2011--fairly soon after KCRF wrapped. During KCRF that year I felt good and I looked good (when I wasn't swollen). I was still having problems with energy and swelling, but I had enough in me to do things like Week in the Life Photo projects, and I had a handle on the swelling issues by simply not eating, and the acupuncture was helping a lot (as opposed to now, when my two options are more-swollen and less-swollen). Of course, I was also taking Provigil...Hmm. Well, anyway, that's not an option now. The point is, the last time I remember feeling good for a consistent period (weeks in a row) was October 2011.
Winters are always hard on me, mentally and physically. So it's no surprise I hit a slump in November. When I started feeling better in the spring, despite some occasional increase in swelling and sleeping issues, I started CrossFit. Don't get me wrong, I loved CrossFit. I LOVED IT. My body, however, didn't. I agree withmckitterick that it was the nail in my health's coffin (ironically). I went when I was tired, and I went when I felt like crap because I really enjoyed it and I liked the people. And yeah, I saw results. After six months, though, I had that dizzy spell with the loss of hearing and ear-ringing and my acupuncturist said I needed to sit my ass down. So I sat my ass down, but nothing got better.
Maybe it's because it's winter, so nothing got better. That'smckitterick's theory. I don't know. I have trouble being convinced of that. I've done so many things to improve myself (seeing Dr. Khosh, continuing acupuncture, being super conscientious about my food intake, regular yoga, better sleep), and I'm barely maintaining. I would say I've improved a bit (judging by the waist measurement at the beginning of the month), but my measurements are back up to where they were before I started the AIP, so I don't think there's actually any fat loss. It was just a conveniently-timed loss of swelling. I'm hoping that this spring things start moving in a good direction, but I have no idea what a simple weather change is going to do.
I'm tired of feeling like a sausage (a tired, unhealthy sausage) in my own skin.
Note: After eating breakfast, it's uncomfortable for me to sit at my desk because my skirt is biting into my waist. It's only 10:50am and I desperately need a nap.
mckitterick and I talked a little bit last night about this long-lasting slump. My health started taking this turn for the worse in November 2011--fairly soon after KCRF wrapped. During KCRF that year I felt good and I looked good (when I wasn't swollen). I was still having problems with energy and swelling, but I had enough in me to do things like Week in the Life Photo projects, and I had a handle on the swelling issues by simply not eating, and the acupuncture was helping a lot (as opposed to now, when my two options are more-swollen and less-swollen). Of course, I was also taking Provigil...Hmm. Well, anyway, that's not an option now. The point is, the last time I remember feeling good for a consistent period (weeks in a row) was October 2011. Winters are always hard on me, mentally and physically. So it's no surprise I hit a slump in November. When I started feeling better in the spring, despite some occasional increase in swelling and sleeping issues, I started CrossFit. Don't get me wrong, I loved CrossFit. I LOVED IT. My body, however, didn't. I agree with
mckitterick that it was the nail in my health's coffin (ironically). I went when I was tired, and I went when I felt like crap because I really enjoyed it and I liked the people. And yeah, I saw results. After six months, though, I had that dizzy spell with the loss of hearing and ear-ringing and my acupuncturist said I needed to sit my ass down. So I sat my ass down, but nothing got better.Maybe it's because it's winter, so nothing got better. That's
mckitterick's theory. I don't know. I have trouble being convinced of that. I've done so many things to improve myself (seeing Dr. Khosh, continuing acupuncture, being super conscientious about my food intake, regular yoga, better sleep), and I'm barely maintaining. I would say I've improved a bit (judging by the waist measurement at the beginning of the month), but my measurements are back up to where they were before I started the AIP, so I don't think there's actually any fat loss. It was just a conveniently-timed loss of swelling. I'm hoping that this spring things start moving in a good direction, but I have no idea what a simple weather change is going to do. I'm tired of feeling like a sausage (a tired, unhealthy sausage) in my own skin.
Note: After eating breakfast, it's uncomfortable for me to sit at my desk because my skirt is biting into my waist. It's only 10:50am and I desperately need a nap.