Oh my stockings and garters

[clevermanka]

When I was a pre-teen, my mother tried to teach me how to put on my own tights. This was the way-early 80s, and heavy cable-knit cotton tights were popular and easily-found for little girls who liked to wear skirts in the winter months. My childhood body was shaped something like a potato, so skirts were a year-round necessity. Despite my mother's patient instruction, I still wound up with the cable pattern wonky, the waistband twisted out of shape, and the crotch somewhere around mid-thigh. By my teens, I'd graduated to Actual Pantyhose, and I never got more than three wearings out of a pair before I'd put a finger through the panty top or somewhere in the thigh.

Shortly before she died, my grandmother took me aside and said "Why don't you buy a garter belt and some stockings. They're easier. I never liked pantyhose, either." This, along, with her wedding ring and KitchenAid mixer, I count among her final and most precious gifts to me. I should note, this was a woman who didn't like underwear in general.

So, at the tender age of fifteen, I began my love affair with stockings and garter belts as a practical alternative to pantyhose. I didn't think of them as terribly sexy. They were simply a welcome relief to my struggles with that hated pantyhose waistband. Any prurient appeal took a backseat. A way back seat. Like the back-facing seat of an old station wagon back seat.

I remember the first time I put them on (for church!). I got them on perfectly (in short time, I would graduate to seamed hose with nary a crooked line), clipped them, and then paused. I put on my robe and headed out to the kitchen, where grandma sat with her coffee. "How do I go to the bathroom?" I asked. She didn't even look up from her newspaper. "If you're wearing shorts, they go on the outside."

After that, the only thing I didn't understand was why pantyhose had become so popular. The only use for them I could see was for wearing under miniskirts. I knew for darn sure that 90% of the women I saw wearing hosiery under their knee-length or longer skirts were not wearing stockings. I just couldn't understand why.

Now I know. Probably most of them didn't grow up with my grandma. Poor things.

Note: If you are interested in purchasing a practical garterbelt, not some silly frilly thing that wouldn't hold up a piece of paper much less a stocking, but don't know where to start looking, please see my suggestions in a comment to pointoforigin about garter belt styles.

Comments

[fairgoldberry.livejournal.com]

I tried a garter belt in my 20s, and ran into two problems. The first was that it kept falling down, and the second was that I had the "how do I pee?" dilemma.

You know, it NEVER occurred to me to put on underwear over the garter belt. That actually resolves *both* my issues, I think, because the underwear give a little added support (and the fact that I've lost some waist fluffiness will help quite a bit too, and that my prior attempt was in fact a frilly thing that wouldn't hold up a piece of paper and now I know better).

I hate pantyhose because they take 'chafing' to a whole new level of "Oh god, oh god, why did I add SANDPAPER to the equation?" but had come more to peace with them since the weight loss decreased chafing issues overall, and will probably now make the shift completely to garters instead, except for my two short skirts, one of which I can wear with cute knee-highs anyway. You've totally revolutionized my thinking on garter belts with the simple phrase "hey, panties on the OUTSIDE," and it feels very silly not to have thought of that when I was struggling with it fifteen years ago. Thank you so much!

Much love,
Rowan

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

This makes me ridiculously, illogically happy.

My very first job was a salesclerk at the lingerie counter of a family-owned department store. Something of that desire to help people be happy with their underwear has stuck with me through the years. I'm so pleased to be able to help you, too!