A person of industry

[clevermanka]

I realized something this morning, as I sat drinking my coffee and paging through porn. Mmmm weekend morning porn...mmmm Shakes Self okay, see, that's the problem. Not porn itself, no (god no), but there are many other things I want to do. I've been up for two hours now, and here is what I've accomplished:

Finished two cups of coffee and a scrambled egg
Checked my email (woefully absent of any anticipated missives)
Read a lot of porn

Now those aren't bad things, and god knows I wouldn't pass judgment on anyone who spent their Sunday morning like that. But I spent my Saturday morning like that, too (except for the scrambled egg because yesterday I had no appetite until after noon). And really. With everything that I want to do? I can only afford to give myself one weekend morning to indulge in lazy behavior. And that's being really generous.

I'm working to pretend I'm something I'm not (yet) in order to change my behaviors, correct? Correct. So as soon as I finish this LJ entry (because it's important for me to get this all out in writing, even though nobody else really cares, I know) I'm going to start pretending that I am an industrious and driven individual.

Despite what some people might think (and let me assure those of you who fall into this deluded category: You are sorely mistaken), I am basically a lazy person. I just am. I don't feel bad about it. It's just a fact of my nature--like the fact that I'm a morning person, or that I am impatient and stubborn. I don't ascribe negative or positive values to these traits, either to myself or others. They just are. But if one of those traits is interfering with something that I want to do, I need to overcome it--even if I don't think of it as bad. It's simply something that is, at the moment, keeping me from something I want to do. And I think that makes it a lot harder to quit the behavior.

It's a lot easier for me to shake loose of a behavior that I believe is damaging to me (eating processed and high-sugar foods, for example). Once I made up my mind to do a Whole30, there were no worries about backsliding or cheating. Even though I didn't have the proof yet that such foods were causing me physical and emotional harm, I knew it in my gut snerk that these were bad things that I didn't want in my life. So it was very easy for me to make that switch to a different behavior.

But being lazy doesn't do me any harm. My life would be perfectly fine (is perfectly fine!) if I spent every morning bopping around on fanfic sites and Tumblr. I suppose continued multi-hour sessions of reading about the same characters might cause me some crisis where I would have to branch out into new fandoms, but really, that's hardly detrimental to my well-being. The only thing that being lazy does is keeps me from doing things that I think might be kinda neat. I'm not one to weep and angst over Roads Not Taken, and it's difficult for me to place the Might Be Kinda Neat things in a place of priority over things that I Know I Like A Lot.

Those kinda neat things, though...they could be more than neat. They could be really awesome. As awesome as being lazy with coffee and porn. But I'll not have an opportunity to experience just how awesome they might be unless I devote a significant amount of time to them--which means pretending to be that industrious and driven individual I mentioned earlier.

So, that's enough blathering about it. I think I've gotten out of my system now all the thinky thoughts I have about this right now. Now I'm going to go be industrious and driven because I am an industrious and driven person.

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_luaineach/]

But being lazy doesn't do me any harm. My life would be perfectly fine (is perfectly fine!)

No surprise, I guess, but I have this EXACT issue and can totally to this statement in particular.

Despite what some people might think (and let me assure those of you who fall into this deluded category: You are sorely mistaken), I am basically a lazy person.

I have to say, though, that I *was* kinda surprised that you were quite willing to laze around a whole saturday (is that what day it was?) just reading on the couch because I *had* imagined you slightly more bustling. And I kept having little flashes of guilt that maybe you were lazing against your nature/judgment just for *my* benefit. :D At any rate, whatever the motivation, I totally needed that day!

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

OMG perfect icon is perfect.

I'm glad I was able to offer you some much-needed laziness when you were here! Yay! =D It was delightful for me, too.

[siro-gravity.livejournal.com]

what do you want to do? I mean, it sounds like something very particular.

Also, there is damaging, and there is damaging.

Lemme just say, that I am not really lazy, but can be prone to over-enjoying certain amusements. World of Warcraft. Nuff sed. I had to quit it to get my junk done, and I'm glad I did. Because what I replaced the amusement with, was something that I find equally engaging. Actually, it's more engaging.

I have a lot harder time not eating processed foods, which I think are manufactured as a means of population control...slowly, or not-so-slowly killing us off.

What is a "Whole30"?

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

I want to dance more. I want to create more art projects. I want to be better read in certain genres (most specifically, horror). Those are the top three.

Here's info on the Whole30 (http://whole9life.com/category/whole-30/). You can read about my own experiences with doing it by checking out my whole30 tagged posts (http://chernobylred.livejournal.com/tag/whole30).

[siro-gravity.livejournal.com]

ah. I don't like meat, so that's not a plan that would work for me.

Man, those are all good things to want!!
Have you read Kathe Koja? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kathe_Koja) Her style of writing is amazing. I imagine it's not everybody's cup of tea, but it does happen to be MY cup of tea.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

Thank you for the author recommendation!

[tleex.livejournal.com]

I go through waves of productivity. Hiked this morning, but now I'm curled up on the couch with laptop, fuzzy cat, and a snuggie. I don't intend to move from this spot for the next couple of hours.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

Ha ha ha ha! Good for you!

[shrijani.livejournal.com]

I, too, am lazy by nature. I am doing some similar things with work, school, and exercise. I am pretending to be a person who is committed, organized, and present in the moment.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

*fistbump*

[saffronhare.livejournal.com]

Over the years, I've found the most success in managing those over-corrections that lead to following one extreme or another for a long period of time. (Kinda like riding a bike, where balance is achieved by continued forward momentum and small corrections. Or walking the "lightning path" ing QBLH, however you might spell it.)

If I'm not careful, I'll get so caught up in DOING that I end up in pain and in tears by bedtime. Or let a day or two go by without doing dishes or getting dressed, which is pretty disastrous around here.

Weird as it may be, I use a timer to keep from losing track of time, so I can switch gears as needed. I slept in today, but since then I've prepped meatloaf for tonight, gotten all the Xmas decorations put away, rearranged the tree-free living room, downloaded and browsed through a database I'll be admin for this year, and done two loads of laundry. Now? I'm sitting down to play some online majhong and watch football. I use the commercial breaks to dust and vacuum and then swing into Sunday Dinner mode in about 90 minutes.

Alas, no crochet. Maybe later this evening, once my "win tomorrow" checklist is done.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

*nodding*

Chop Wood, Carry Water.

It's just that for a while now, I haven't even bothered to pick up the damn axe and I have no clue where I put that damn bucket. =D

[saffronhare.livejournal.com]

And I get so deeply into the chopping and carrying that I forget to DANCE (metaphorically or literally). That's where I need to improve, right there.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

We need to hang out and influence each other more often.

[saffronhare.livejournal.com]

LOGIC. You are dripping with it, but not in a gross way.

[redheadfae.livejournal.com]

If I let my laziness take over, my life gets pretty overwhelming in a disastrous way, and like saffronhare, letting the doing take over ends me up in pain and exhaustion, too. I use the oven timer for laundry, reminding me to get off my ass, feeding the cats, making my tea,.. so many things as well.

Gotta do something creative every so often, or I get a bit too nutty, it's like it siphons off some of the crazy cup.

Mmm. porn. Time for some of that, I think, because right now, I know what that will lead to, and I'm SO THERE. ;)

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

Ha ha ha ha ha! Oh, <3

[sdemory.livejournal.com]

So, how much of the laziness is a response to the amount of stuff that's been on your plate over the past, say, YEARS? Any chance that trimming down the task list would help you feel like you're kicking and taking and, thus, point you in the direction of being industrious and driven?

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

how much of the laziness is a response to the amount of stuff that's been on your plate over the past, say, YEARS?

Honestly? I was much more productive when I was working part time, and going to school and smoking dope full time. If I am adequately busy, I can accomplish mountains of things and have a hell of a good time doing them. It's just a matter of getting the ball rolling.

I'm learning not to compare and contrast with the hares

[adamposadas.livejournal.com]

...I mean, it's not so much that I'm *NOT* productive, and much more so that Industrial Productivity Rules The World. Let's face it bravely together: I'm a mountainside village storyteller. Possibly a reed-flute-playing goatherd. I get it that there's a pace to life that gets me where I'm a'posta be when I'm s'posta be there, but then there's this whole _OTHER_ pace that's kinda just Now Moment after Now Moment, strung along a thread of Ah. Jessayin...

Re: I&#39;m learning not to compare and contrast with the hares

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

The two paces are both necessary and valuable. I just have a tendency to let one take over my life. This is unfortunate when I know I benefit from making use of the other one.

And yes! to facing it together. It makes things easier when you know others are thinging with you.