Relief

[clevermanka]

I spent a lot of yesterday afternoon, evening, and parts of this morning wondering if I did the right thing by stepping forward to speak at yesterday's demonstration for Michael Brown. At the time, I felt a little awkward about it because I strongly feel that there are not enough black voices being heard in this conversation and I am concerned that too many white people are making this about them and their feelings about race--even if they're sympathetic, there are just...a lot of white voices talking. A lot of them were talking yesterday. And that's one of the things I (ironically) pointed out when I spoke up at the event.

Then I went back to my spot and wondered if I'd been out of line. But if I'm going to regret something, I'd rather regret what I did than what I didn't, even if it did lead to moments later in the day when I literally cringed at myself (yes, I do this, too, just like everyone else).

But just now, one of our black graduate students stopped by my office to thank me. He said of all the non-POCs who spoke, I was the only one whose remarks didn't irritate or upset him in some way. He told me that he turned to another black grad student and said "She gets it."

I can't tell you the relief.

I don't want or expect ally cookies. I don't deserve special thanks for simply being a decent human being. But wow it feels good to know I'm generally on the right track. I hope he takes my request to call me on my shit when/if I ever do fuck up.

Comments

[mundungus42.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I'll give you Awesome Person Cookies instead.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

*nom*nom*nom*

[sherwood21.livejournal.com]

How about regular thanks for being a decent human being? I'm glad you did say it, because it's a very valid point. And I'm glad that grad student told you it meant something to him. :)

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

Aw, thanks, bb.

[hdsqrl.livejournal.com]

I shall give you a fabulous scarf instead. But only because I'd give it to you anyway. Well, you'll have to pry it off the llama, first, but that's easy for a person with your caliber of awesomeness. ;)

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

[write-out.livejournal.com]

Here are some more Awesome Person Cookies. I can imagine the relief! I'm glad you got such great feedback.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

Thank you, they are delicious.

[whirledpeas.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you spoke up...and pointed out that important point as well. This has been a terrible mess.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

Oh my god, SUCH A MESS.

[saffronhare.livejournal.com]

It's so good to know that your intention shone through...very kind of him to give you that feedback.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

It really was. I'm sure he doesn't know how much I'd been fretting about it.

[redheadfae.livejournal.com]

All the FEELS.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

[redheadfae.livejournal.com]

[theoneinblue.livejournal.com]

Hugs! ❤️

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]