My creys

[clevermanka]

My mood clock has switched over to Winter Blahs. I don't want to do anything except sit on the couch. Maybe read. Maybe watch a movie. But mostly just sit on the couch.

I'm shockingly bloated for no reason. Really no reason. This is the puffiest I've been in months. It's Day Three of a Whole30 for me, so everything that could even possibly trigger a bad swelling reaction should be all flushed out. So I have no idea what's going on. I had acupuncture on Tuesday and still had bad swelling issues the very next day--like belly hanging over my jeans waistband bad swelling.

What is the deal.

The swelling isn't helping the blahs, and the blahs aren't helping my motivation to get the damn costume for Pat's benefit done, and I might be asked to do three songs, so I need to figure out what to do for a third set and whine whine whine whine.

I'm getting on a plane in four hours to spend four days in Indianapolis--four days I can't work on the costume or practice to music. But I will have plenty of time to sit on a couch and read or watch a movie with my parents, so there's that.

I need to talk to someone (PCP? Acupuncturist? Someone new?) about this winter depression crap. I didn't have to deal with it for several years, but now it's back with a vengeance. And no, those light box things don't help. I need something a little more aggressive.

New boots might help. Maybe I should just tell my principles to fuck off and order the boots from Amazon already.

And sweet Jesus I would love some coffee. Fucking hell, this is going to be my first winter as an adult with no coffee.

Comments

[radiantmephit.livejournal.com]

I so have the Winter Blahs. It does not matter that it was 71 degrees on Monday. What matters is that it's still quite dark at 7:45 am. It feels like there is sand in my veins. I seriously can't remember how I did this last year. Or the year before. Without coffee I would be doomed. Can you do tea?

I am excited to see the performance you're working on. I'm planning to go and wear the costume Natalie and I worked on for KCRF '09. I wore it for Halloween and it got sweet compliments. Squeezes the dickens out of me, but it's for a good cause.

Boots! My brother works at a sporting goods store in San Jose and he's sending me a pair* as a birthday present. I so wish they were here already. What happened to the gorgeous riding boots you bought last year? Not comfy enough? Badass enough? Tall enough?

*Either these: http://www.thenorthface.com/catalog/sc-gear/womens-footwear/womens-alycia.html
Or these: http://www.zappos.com/sorel-joan-of-arctic-black

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

It does not matter that it was 71 degrees on Monday. What matters is that it's still quite dark at 7:45 am. It feels like there is sand in my veins.

Yes, this. Exactly this. This this this.

I'm so happy to hear you're coming to the Pat thing. Yay!

Regarding the boots--no, last year's boots are still loved and awesome. But I want something in brown. With laces. I am a fickle and mercurial creature who demands frequent additions and novelty to her wardrobe. Unfortunately for my bank account, my favorite fashion item happens to be boots. It would be easier if I was as keen for things like scarves or belt. But no. Boots.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

Just checked the links you gave. Those are all too wintery-looking. My current obsession was inspired by Mountie Boots (http://www.albertaboot.com/police_boots.htm).

[hdsqrl.livejournal.com]

I vote Yes on the boots. Do it, for they will make you smile. :)

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

TEMPTRESS.

[ms-danson.livejournal.com]

In addition to the lamp (too bad it doesn't work for you), I increase my vitamin D intake in the winter.

Have you found the boots yet? I'll keep an eye out. I'm in the land of the Mountie so they *should* have them around here somewhere. I drive by the RCMP musical ride horses on my way to work. (They are used for actual police work sometimes.)

BTW... Apparently SAD is connected to core body temperature in some manner that I'm only now investigating.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

I drive by the RCMP musical ride horses on my way to work.

I think I just combusted from envy.

Apparently SAD is connected to core body temperature in some manner that I'm only now investigating.

Wow. WOW. I always run way low on body temp. I rarely break 98--usually hovering around 97.8 or so.

[ms-danson.livejournal.com]

This is the first I've heard of the temperature connection so I don't know much about it... but damn right I'm going to look into it. (My hands and feet are freezing right now.)

[redheadfae.livejournal.com]

Let me justify your love.. you would be purchasing from a storefront called Crocs Docs and More, the seller and shipper. Amazon's cut is for the storefront hosting, not much different than any other website hosting with a shopping cart and services provided by the host.

I work for an attorney and can argue any side of the issue at any time, depending on my whims and fancies.

and

WHY THE FUCK IS DAYLIGHT LIGHTER MORNING/DARK NIGHT "SAVINGS" BS SO LATE THIS YEAR????
AAAAAAGGGHGHGHGHGH.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

HA HA HA HA HA!!!

Love you. Maybe I'll go ahead and order when I'm back home from Indy.

[kalimeg.livejournal.com]

It has been BS late ever since Bush moved the weekends to change it outward by one at each end. I hates it.

[shrijani.livejournal.com]

This Whole 30 is definitely triggering some kind of... cleansing response from my body. I can't wait until this phase is no longer necessary.

I am sorry about your swelling and your blahs. Relaxing at your parents' sounds like it might be very therapeutic, even if it does reduce your rehearsal time. I have no doubt that you'll have an inspiration and nail your performance.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

I hope by now the cleansing portion of the experiment is over?

I listened to one of the songs about twenty times on the plane to Indy. I think I've got some good ideas for that one! Now if I can just get the costume done...

[kalimeg.livejournal.com]

St John's Wort is actually psychoactive, and you are not supposed to mix it with anti-depressants. If you have not tried it, you might give it a shot.

[tleex.livejournal.com]

You could forego boots and buy a ticket to Phoenix instead. Lots of sunshine here!

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

Yes, but boots last a long time, and my memory is shoddy at best. =D

[e4q.livejournal.com]

i CANNOT TELL YOU how blah i am. i wonder if i made a mistake coming off psych drugs, but given that i am between doctors it will be a living age til i get to see a psych again, probably nearly springtime unless i make a total song and dance and i don't know i have the energy for that. and even then, well, who knows?

at any rate, i sympathise. also, i am still spotty/have rash from whatever and also can't seem to stop myself from scratching, which really doesn't help.

i will probably blog just to debrief. needless to say it will be f locked.

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

POOR THING. Spottiness and rashes on top of the blahs? Ugh.

*sympathy*

[e4q.livejournal.com]

i know. i am pretty convinced it is a food allergy, but i am too confused right now to work out what in the what what's it might be.

[nottygypsy.livejournal.com]

Have a good visit with your parents!

[clevermanka.livejournal.com]

It was...good. Nice to be home, though!