clevermanka (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
clevermanka) wrote2013-12-09 09:08 am
clevermanka) wrote2013-12-09 09:08 am
Entry tags:
It really did seem like a good idea at the time
Here's a cultural lesson for you: Never try to beat the Chinese graduate student to paying the dinner bill by pretending to go to the bathroom, flagging down the waitress, and having her run your credit card while said Chinese graduate student isn't looking. Chinese graduate student will wind up being horrified, nearly burst into tears, and beg to repay you for ten minutes while fellow restaurant patrons look on curiously. Because this is not how they roll in China, yo. Chinese graduate student will then show up at your office the next day with a lovely thank you card and approximately twice the amount of the dinner bill enclosed, in cash.
Live and learn.
In other news, I am sleeping better! I have no idea why because I haven't changed a single damn thing, but I'm waking up around 4:50/5:00am instead of 2:30/3:00a and that is just fine, thanks.
Also, my fatigue levels are decreasing. You'd think these were related, but it might just be coincidence. I've often had fatigue issues despite getting adequate sleep, so I'm putting this under the Correlation Does Not Imply Causation tag. In any case, it's nice. I don't start feeling like I need a nap until 12:30 or so. Progress! I got pretty tired yesterday but managed to power through the afternoon okay once I got busy doing stuff in the kitchen. Was really ready for bed by 8:30pm, though.
Hypnotherapy continues. At my Thursday session I mentioned to Jennifer my concerns that I was faking my responses--that I couldn't at all tell if I was processing stuff, and I felt like I was just raising my finger because I didn't know what else to do. She said that was fine, that everyone responds differently, and there are no wrong ways to do this. So that was...reassuring? I guess? I did have a couple weirdly fun experiences that night. A couple times during the session my brain really did check out. I started drifting, sort of like falling asleep, but more like falling asleep under anesthesia. I was aware of my surroundings and then *bang* I was aware that time had passed but I had no idea of how long or if she'd said anything or what. NGL, it was kind of cool to experience that in a safe environment. When I asked her about it afterward, she said at no time did I seem to be asleep or have a long delay in responding. So the episodes didn't last long, but I honestly could have been out of it for fifteen minutes and I wouldn't have known. I have two more sessions before my prepaid visits run out. I think at that time I'll take a couple weeks to evaluate how this is working for me and, if I want, resume sessions after the new year.
My office is so cold today. In addition to my regular clothes (wool socks, leggings, wool skirt, tee shirt, cashmere twinset, scarf), I'm wearing a third sweater, my fingerless gloves, a blanket covering my legs, the scarf pulled over my head, and my microwaveable bean bag kitty on my lap. I'm still freezing. Every once in a while I lift bean kitty to my face to warm up my nose. My illegal radiant heater under my desk is (as far as I can tell) not doing a damn bit of good. But I know I'd probably be even colder with out it. M-i-s-e-r-a-b-l-e.
Live and learn.
In other news, I am sleeping better! I have no idea why because I haven't changed a single damn thing, but I'm waking up around 4:50/5:00am instead of 2:30/3:00a and that is just fine, thanks.
Also, my fatigue levels are decreasing. You'd think these were related, but it might just be coincidence. I've often had fatigue issues despite getting adequate sleep, so I'm putting this under the Correlation Does Not Imply Causation tag. In any case, it's nice. I don't start feeling like I need a nap until 12:30 or so. Progress! I got pretty tired yesterday but managed to power through the afternoon okay once I got busy doing stuff in the kitchen. Was really ready for bed by 8:30pm, though.
Hypnotherapy continues. At my Thursday session I mentioned to Jennifer my concerns that I was faking my responses--that I couldn't at all tell if I was processing stuff, and I felt like I was just raising my finger because I didn't know what else to do. She said that was fine, that everyone responds differently, and there are no wrong ways to do this. So that was...reassuring? I guess? I did have a couple weirdly fun experiences that night. A couple times during the session my brain really did check out. I started drifting, sort of like falling asleep, but more like falling asleep under anesthesia. I was aware of my surroundings and then *bang* I was aware that time had passed but I had no idea of how long or if she'd said anything or what. NGL, it was kind of cool to experience that in a safe environment. When I asked her about it afterward, she said at no time did I seem to be asleep or have a long delay in responding. So the episodes didn't last long, but I honestly could have been out of it for fifteen minutes and I wouldn't have known. I have two more sessions before my prepaid visits run out. I think at that time I'll take a couple weeks to evaluate how this is working for me and, if I want, resume sessions after the new year.
My office is so cold today. In addition to my regular clothes (wool socks, leggings, wool skirt, tee shirt, cashmere twinset, scarf), I'm wearing a third sweater, my fingerless gloves, a blanket covering my legs, the scarf pulled over my head, and my microwaveable bean bag kitty on my lap. I'm still freezing. Every once in a while I lift bean kitty to my face to warm up my nose. My illegal radiant heater under my desk is (as far as I can tell) not doing a damn bit of good. But I know I'd probably be even colder with out it. M-i-s-e-r-a-b-l-e.
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That is interesting about the changes you're experiencing in hypnotherapy. What is the benefit that's intended to come out of that exercise? Just relaxation?
Holy shit what is wrong with your office. D: *sends tiny angry cat to cuddle on your feet*
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Crappy frozen beans re: your office-icebox. Sounds like it's time to up the illegal-heater-power quotient. I'll start looking for a higher-powered replacement... or maybe a second one, whichever you'd prefer.
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A couple times during the session my brain really did check out. I started drifting, sort of like falling asleep, but more like falling asleep under anesthesia. I was aware of my surroundings and then *bang* I was aware that time had passed but I had no idea of how long or if she'd said anything or what. NGL, it was kind of cool to experience that in a safe environment. When I asked her about it afterward, she said at no time did I seem to be asleep or have a long delay in responding. So the episodes didn't last long, but I honestly could have been out of it for fifteen minutes and I wouldn't have known.
That sounds like the fugues I would sometimes have at work, or in class, when I was really exhausted --- I would snap back and realize I had no idea what had happened in the last time interval, or how long said time interval was. Since memory is extremely important to me, that was pretty scary -- so I agree, your point about the safe environment is crucial.
Is your hypnotherapy experience in any way similar to your experience with meditation, if any? Just curious.
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Kinda, yeah. I never experience any sort of mystical shit or "out of body" things. I'm always very present and aware of my surroundings. Except for those couple examples this last time when I checked out. That was new!
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Boo for cold office, that's completely horrid. I send warm waves of fuzzy blanket goodness your way.
PS "crappy frozen beans" and "mystical shit" both made me chuckle.
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Hooray for additional sleeps though! Do you keep a journal of sleep hours? Is there a cycle to them?
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I don't keep a journal of sleeping, no. That's not a bad idea. The idea of tracking stuff like that is in itself exhausting, though.
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I am so glad that you are getting more sleep! That is SO GOOD!
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